Tuesday, August 24

umm...WTF, dogs!!!?

Well...it seems as though I have a little story to share with you all. 

Sometimes I think my life should be a TV show because sometimes things happen that are just too ridiculous for people not to know about.

Case in point: I spent the last 2 1/2 hours outside because my puppies locked me out. 

Yep.

You may ask, how did this happen exactly? 
Let me tell you.

So, the way our townhome is set up is like this {please enjoy the following professional image}
Because our garage is beyond the backyard, we ALWAYS go out the sliding glass door from the back of the house and very very rarely use the front door. Because the sliding glass door only has a kind of wimpy lock on it, we also put a broomstick in the door for extra lockage.  Like this:
So, this morning my day was off to a GREAT start because I slept til 11am - nearly 12 hours of sleep! Hooray! I propped up the broomstick, let the dogs out, and tried to decide where to start my day. I decided I should finish painting my jewelry hanger, so I let the dogs in and myself out so that I could spraypaint the jewelry hanger without them getting in the paint and stuff. No sooner had I begun spraying, I heard a loud clatter at the glass door.

This, in and of itself, isn't uncommon. They usually wrestle and smash each other into doors and walls. However, this particular body slam had caused them to knock the broomstick from its precariously propped position down into locked position wedged between the doors. 

F.M.L.

At first I kind of chuckled. Tyler got done with school at noon so he would be home by 12:30pm. I could wait an hour and a half. After finishing my paint project, I cozied into my lounge chair and enjoyed the morning sun on my face.

I was thinking about how all we had to do was use Tyler's keys to unlock the front doors...when I realized only I had one of the front door keys. We have a glass door then our real door in the front, and if we go out the front we just don't lock the glass one because Tyler doesn't have a key for it. 

Seeing as how I was accidentally outside, all the doors were locked from the inside...and our one key to the glass door was locked inside as well. Eff. You might be thinking, "Well, that is pretty stupid for your husband to not have a copy of that key." Well, yeah. I know that. Thanks. 20/20 hindsight is awesome, isn't it?

So, at this point I realized we were going to have to break in or call a locksmith. This is what the situation resembled now:
Crap crap crap. In my PJs with wild woman hair, I wasn't feeling like marching over to a neighbor's house. Considering they don't speak to me anyway. *sigh* So I decided to try to get the dogs to pull the stick out of lock position.

I walked up to the glass doors, crouched down, and pointed down. I said, "Take it! Take it!" That command means for them to take whatever I point to, and for a sliver of a second I thought it might work. They both sniffed and even licked the broomstick. But they didn't take it. Damn. 

I must mention that by this point, both dogs were pretty pissed at me. Penny was licking the door frantically, crying, and doing what I call the "wax on, wax off" motion with her paw on the door. Gryffin was sulking with his head on his paws just staring at me. 

Instead of breaking in on my own, I decided to wait for Tyler so I didn't do something stupid without his consent at least. In the meantime, I did squats. I also figured out what I would bring with me if I were ever to be planning to be deserted on an island. Chapstick (my lips got real chapped in this hour by myself), water, food (I hadn't had breakfast!), and reading material. Random, but true. 

Tyler finally pulls into the garage, and I smile at him and say, "We have a problem. Kind of a funny problem. But still a problem." After explaining to him the situation, we went to work trying to break in. I used a flathead screwdriver to try to wedge apart our sliding glass doors so we could have enough space to slip in our camping marshmallow roasters and try to flip the pole out of place. It looked like this:
See how close yet so far we were?!?! (Yes, this picture is taken from inside, after we got in eventually)

Marshmallow roaster idea didn't work. Dammit. We agreed that we didn't want to call a locksmith because we got locked out a house in Georgetown (by DC) and it cost $300 to have a locksmith come (that's a whole different story...)! So we decided to use one of our hacksaws and just cut the lock in the front door. Haha. It would be cheaper to just buy a new lock at the Home Depot than to call a locksmith. 

So there we were, outside the front of our house, hacksawing in. Neighbors walked by and assessed the situation with cocked eybrows. No one asked what was going on, though. And no one called the cops. Apparently no one was concerned at all. 45 minutes of sawing later...with the dogs watching us out the front window the whole time...the lock broke! Hooray! Here is the miracle tool and the lock we sawed through:
Now we are all inside. We will be getting a new lock and we BOTH will have keys to the lock - genius idea, right? I have also decided that upon taking the broomstick out of the door for the day, we should store it in the water heater closet so that it cannot be knocked into the door. Lol.

Sometimes the darndest things have to happen to make us learn. 

So that's my story for this Tuesday. 
Hope it brought you some entertainment!
Do any of you have a ridiculous story that involves being locked out? Maybe your dogs locked you out of your house, too???

Cheers to living and learning!

4 comments:

  1. I loved the illustrations! Definitely brought an extra element to the story. My old apartment had one of those little security bars across the middle of the sliding door and every time I went out I left the door open cause I was too afraid that bar would somehow fall and lock me out on the balcony.

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  2. This is such a funny post and story! Thank you for the laugh!...I especially liked the illustrations:)

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  3. Funny post/story. Loved the illustrations. However I am betting that it wasn't fun while it was happening.
    I do have a suggestion in case you get locked out again. When getting a new lock and keys made for both you and Tyler, make some extras and put them in a safe spot on the outside of your house so that in case one of you doesn't have any keys on you, you will still be able to get in.

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  4. Totally been there. The dude locked me out of the house when he was a year and a half. And he laughed. I had to call the hubs home from work. HA!

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How sweet of you to comment :) I love you for it!